Who better to offer safe sex lessons than GWAR leader Blothar?
Well, almost anyone – but that hasn’t stopped him recording a public service announcement where he provides practical advice for putting on a condom.
He claims: “First of all, sex should never be safe – there should always be a risk involved. A lot of risk. I like to think of it like going to a casino… just stay away from the craps table, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.”
The main item at risk in the clip is the banana he uses to demonstrate condom application. If anyone ends up looking like the “safe as milk” result, there’s probably a lawsuit they can file.
GWAR guitarist Pustulus Maximus recently made his own video for Metal Injection, listing the 10 people he’d like to kill, and predictably including many more than 10 people.
It’s all a shameless promotional campaign for the band’s latest album, The New Dark Ages, which arrived on June 3, described by Blothar as “the greatest rock record of all time.”
He added: “These are the songs for a new age, a New Dark Age, when men live by the dimming light of a technology destined to betray them. Listen, as we have a rock and roll orgy in the ruins of the world to celebrate humanity’s descent into an age of darkness, disease, ignorance, and death.”
The band have a number of festival appearances booked before commencing a UK tour. ”We shall sweep across the continent like the plague,” Blothar vowed, ”bringing pestilence and death and our unquenchable thirst for heavy metal glory.”