Have you ever seen a ghost?
Michael Starr (Steel Panther): “I’ve never seen a ghost, but I have felt the presence of one. It was in the attic room of my babysitter’s house – I was taking a nap, and I felt this cold, young girl come up from underneath the bed and through the blankets. I don’t know if I was dreaming, but it was the worst feeling I’ve ever had in my life. It freaked me out – I never slept in that room again!”
Brann Dailor (Mastodon): “I thought I saw this green orb float across my kitchen when I was 13. I had a puzzled look on my face, and my mom said, ‘What do you see?’ And I said, ‘I see this green orb.’ And she was like, ‘You see it, too?’ It was really bizarre.”
Joe Duplantier (Gojira): “One time I was having a bad dream with an old lady trying to put a spell on me. I woke up, and I saw a clear shape of someone standing in front of me. My reaction was like an animal with all the hairs standing on end. It was the most terrifying moment of my life.”
Becca MacIntyre (Marmozets): “I’ve never seen a ghost, but I’ve definitely had some experiences with some dark stuff, like shadows on the wall. And I’ve felt very uncomfortable in situations where I know that something is not of this realm. Everyone has demons. I believe in God, so I guess I have to believe in a Devil.”
Will Gould (Creeper): “When I was a kid, I was sat in one of those baby seats in the car with my mum. My grandad was in the Navy, but he’d passed away a number of years before. I was apparently chatting to a man in the front seat of the car as we were driving. She asked who I was chatting to, and I said, ‘The sailor in the front seat.’ And I described his uniform and apparently it was the spitting image of my grandad! True story.”
What’s the meanest trick you’ve ever played on someone?
Michael: “Without telling ’em? You know what I did – I put a condom on before I fucked this chick, because she would not fuck me unless I wore a condom. And as I was putting it on, I pinched it with my fingernail and tore it. Then I fucked her, and afterwards I was like, ‘Trick or treat!’ She was bummed. [Please don’t try this at home, everyone – Sex And Human Decency Ed].”
Brann: “When I was 13 or 14, I was on acid with a bunch of friends, and we used to play this game called The Magic Box. We would tell the person who’s tripping that we’re going to put this box on their head, and they’re not going to be able to hear sound. So we put the box on this guy’s head, and everyone’s pretending to talk, and he just started losing it! I admit that felt pretty bad.”
Joe: “Jean-Michel [Labadie, bassist] has a phobia of snakes. I helped Mario [Duplantier, drummer] put a fake snake that looked super-real in his bunk, so that was cool. And then he filmed his reaction. That was the best – I loved it. He was like, ‘Arghhh!’”
Becca: “I haven’t really played a trick, but when we went out on tour with Issues in the US, the first night was on Halloween. We went to this place which is said to be one of the scariest horror houses in America, and some guy came towards me with an actual chainsaw!”
Will: “On the last US tour we went on, we were all having water fights as a band. Our drummer Dan [Bratton] had taken it a bit too far and covered Oli [Burdett] our guitarist with a bottle of water. At the next truck stop, he was stood out having a cigarette while me and Oli went in and got one of those gallon containers of water. I lured Dan over with a sweet, and as he went to get it, Oli just soaked him. It was the most wet I’ve seen anyone without them being in a swimming pool!”
What are you dressing up as for Halloween this year?
Michael: “Usually, I dress up as a heavy metal dude! But I think I’m gonna be Deadpool. I like that dude. Plus, in the mask, no one knows who I am, so I can just cruise around and have fun with it. Or I could dress up as a fat pirate, and be Johnny Depp.”
Brann: “A Dalmatian dog. I’m going to buy a cheap costume online. I’ll be a giant dog and then my wife will be Cruella De Vil, and walk me on a leash. I’ll have her carry around a doggy bowl and pour beer in it, and I’ll lap it up. That’s how I’ll be getting inebriated that night.”
Joe: “I don’t know, my wife will probably find an idea. Last year, I put on these big-ass army boots that my friend gave me, a black wig, some makeup, and a really cool jacket. I was pretty handsome. My wife was wearing a hat with 25 little naked dolls taped to it, so it was like a baby cake on her head!”
Becca: “This is awful, but the first year that me, Sam and Josh [Becca’s brothers and bandmates] went trick or treating, we dressed as chavs. Pretty horrible, I know, but we just wanted to look really poor so we got more sweets. It worked, though! But I’d like to be a nun smoking a cigarette and doing the things that nuns aren’t supposed to do!”
Will: “We had a really good idea of the whole band dressing up as The Addams Family. I was gonna be Cousin Itt, because I’ve got really long hair. Oli is really cool, so he could be Lurch, Sean [Scott] our bass player is really slick, so he’d be Gomez. Hannah [Greenwood, keys] would be Wednesday and do her hair in the plaits. We’re perfect for it.”
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What scares you the most?
Michael: “Just gettin’ old, man. That scares me the most. Also, I have visions of myself getting hit by a car – I just imagine myself getting taken out. I’m scared of cars, man! Especially in the UK – they’re on the other side!”
Brann: “My own personal death, and what will happen afterwards. I think that nothing happens, which is totally fine. But I guess I’m more nervous that I’m wrong about that. I’m going to be like my grandfather and start going to church just to cover my ass!”
Joe: “People scare me. Growing up, other kids were mean to me. I had big ears, and big feet, and my parents didn’t have money. We would get clothes that were too big or too small, and not the right fashion, so I looked like shit. I became so afraid of other kids that it was like a vicious circle, because they could feel the fear. But I guess now I’m scared people are going to throw something at me, or start being mean for no reason.”
Becca: “I have a fear of the darkness that I’m only just getting over. I’ve been spending time with my family recently, and I normally sleep in the same room with my sister, and she has to sleep with all the lights off. I get this fear that something is going to get me. It’s a spiritual thing, not knowing what’s lurking in the corner and when it might come up for me.”
Will: “I really don’t like crabs at the beach – they’re like moving skeletons. When I was a kid, we used to go crabbing all the time. You put a bit of bacon on the end of a piece of string then throw it into a lake or whatever, and catch the crabs in a bucket. Then you free them all at the end. I remember tipping that whole bucket of crabs back out, and they were all just chasing me back into the sea!”
If you died, who would you haunt?
Michael: “Vince Neil from Mötley Crüe. I would haunt the shit outta that guy. Every time he goes to the fridge, I’d be like, ‘Ooooh, don’t eat!’ Then if he was fucking some chick he doesn’t know, I’d go, ‘Ooooh, she’s got herpes!’ I’d freak him out. It’d be really fun.”
Brann: “I’d probably haunt my local McDonald’s. That’s the place you would least think would be haunted. Everyone always thinks it’s the vacant mental hospital, or the old Victorian house. A McDonald’s is open, with lots of people coming in and out. I’d pick up people’s French fries, and be like, ‘Woooooooo!’”
Joe: “I would probably try to show Mario [Duplantier, Joe’s brother] that I’m around, you know? So when he was painting, I’d take control of his brush and write something like, ‘I’m right here, Mario!’ That would be cool. He could draw a portrait of my face from beyond the grave.”
Becca: “That’s dark, man! Can I be a friendly ghost? Obviously, you have to be dead… ugh! I guess if someone was doing something bad, like one of my brothers was doing drugs, then I’d come back and be like, ‘Yo! Sort your shit out!’ Scare them straight!”
Will: “Donald Trump. Did you hear what he said about Hillary [Clinton] and the guns? [He insinuated that supporters of gun rights could assassinate her.] It’s terrifying, but really clichéd and sad at the same time. He really is like a cartoon devil – it’s crazy. The world has gone insane. It’s a really sad time. The Western world is falling apart!”