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Metallica Megadeth Pointer Sisters
(Image credit: Bill McClintock YouTube)

Without wishing to suggest that we're all dead-eyed, beaten-down zombies grinding joylessly through lives of perpetual mediocrity without an original thought rattling around our skulls, we're fairly confident in stating that there hasn't been a point in any of our lives where we've pondered what it might be like if we melded the music of Metallica, Megadeth, Blue Oyster Cult and The Pointer Sisters into one ungodly mongrel composition. 

Bill McClintock, however, is The Devil.

Obviously we don't mean this is any legally-binding derogatory way, but really, how else can the sonic chaos which this man insists upon unleashing into our world be explained?

Here's the thing; there is no rational reason why splicing and reconstituting the musical DNA of the aforementioned artists into a singular bastard unit should work. And yet, and here we must submit to, and genuflect before, a superior entity, in acknowledgement of the fact that this creation is, at the risk of sounding overly technical, The Shit.

But don't just take our word for it. Here's The Pointer Sisters' Neutron Dance Megadeth's Symphony of Destruction and Tornado of Souls, Metallica's Master of Puppets and Blue Oyster Cult's Godzilla all fucked up and mangled and mashed.

We've been here before, of course, most recently with Van Halen, Quiet Riot and Free. And before that, Slipknot vs The Spice Girls, Motley Crue vs Motown, Metallica vs Huey Lewis and many, many more.  

Let's face it, it's Bill McClintock's world now, we're just along for the ride.

Paul Brannigan
Contributing Editor, Louder

A music writer since 1993, formerly Editor of Kerrang! and Planet Rock magazine (RIP), Paul Brannigan is a Contributing Editor to Louder. Having previously written books on Lemmy, Dave Grohl (the Sunday Times best-seller This Is A Call) and Metallica (Birth School Metallica Death, co-authored with Ian Winwood), his Eddie Van Halen biography (Eruption in the UK, Unchained in the US) emerged in 2021. He has written for Rolling Stone, Mojo and Q, hung out with Fugazi at Dischord House, flown on Ozzy Osbourne's private jet, played Angus Young's Gibson SG, and interviewed everyone from Aerosmith and Beastie Boys to Young Gods and ZZ Top. Brannigan lives in North London and supports The Arsenal.