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These Are Not The Sites You’re Looking For...

Have you ever searched for your favourite band’s website just by sticking a dot com at the end? We did. Find out which websites tried to flog us engine parts, cuddly toys and a canister of mosquito repellant…

PARKWAY DRIVE

ParkwayDrive.com

Our investigation all started with a lazy search for the Aussie band’s website. There’s no sign of the Byron Bay quintet dicking around on surfboards. Instead, we’re presented with a Church Of Christ website which doesn’t mention anything about the follow-up their 2012 album, Atlas.

MOTORHEAD

Motorhead.com

No photos of Lemmy or the Snaggletooth here. Instead, it’s a homepage for engines and Zebedee’s leg. Oh well, you win some, lose some…

THE BRONX

TheBronx.com

‘Young blood! If given a chance, spit fire! Young blood! Destroy the old empi—’… Oh, this has nothing to do with The Bronx. It’s just a page of links to doctors, lawyers and hotels in the New York borough. This is not helping us at all. It’s miles away.

BEHEMOTH

Behemoth.com

A splash of colour and a variety of kid’s games tell us straight away that this has nothing to do with the Gdańsk’s most controversial band. Well, unless Nergal’s aiming to convert kids to Satanism with cute plushies and an online gaming forum. Probably not, though.

BLACK FLAG

BlackFlag.com

We were expecting more from this website. A picture gallery featuring Glen E. Friedman’s iconic shots, perhaps, or a look at Raymond Pettibon’s flyers. Instead, we’ve got a Sons Of Anarchy extra waving a can of bug spray in our face. No thanks.

Come back next week for more URL trickery!

Born in 1976 in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, Simon Young has been a music journalist for over twenty years. His fanzine, Hit A Guy With Glasses, enjoyed a one-issue run before he secured a job at Kerrang! in 1999. His writing has also appeared in Classic RockMetal HammerProg, and Planet Rock. His first book, So Much For The 30 Year Plan: Therapy? — The Authorised Biography is available via Jawbone Press.