You know what’s missing from Iron Maiden’s sound? The humble recorder.
One person actually had this thought in recent weeks. But rather than ignore it and carry on with their day, they did something about it. One YouTuber called shittyflute – the person responsible for the horrific cover of Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody – has embellished the title track from Iron Maiden’s 1992 album Fear Of The Dark with what feels like all the recorders in the world.
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“Iron Maiden is one of my favourite bands and I thought it would be a honour to shittyflute another Iron Maiden song,” they write, using their username as a distressing verb. “I hope you enjoy it, brothers and sisters.”
While we’d love to say it gives Steve Harris’ paean to scotophobia an orchestral bluster, in truth, it’s the sort of cacophony that would challenge even the proudest parents at a primary school recital. Honestly, it’s fucking awful.
This clip lasts 7 minutes 25 seconds. If you make it to the end without crying or grinding your teeth to dust, you deserve a medal.