Some days are slow. Some days we get sent some dreary indie music, some predictable heavy metal, some hope-crushingly formulaic bro-metal… And some days are like today, where you get sent the new video from a band of wolfmen fighting fight sequences of a wolfdudes fighting pigfolk.
And then, just went you think the day has officially peaked, you get sent a video directed by porn-star and Presidential reputation-wrecker Stormy Daniels. That would be weird enough, but the video itself is for a band featuring a “granny” as a singer.
I mean: what? Good work, Wednesday.
You don’t need words about them, but here they are anyway, in case you feel like you need some kind of meaning afterwards:
She Likes Guns allegedly features three of porn’s hottest stars, Lily Lane, Arya Fae and Casey Calvert (we say ‘allegedly’, because we have no idea who these people are and if we Google them at work we’ll end up getting escorted from the building), a load of gun porn and Granny 4 Barrel’s bewigged lead singer, ‘Granny’, who claims to be “offering the public a different perspective when it comes to Americans’ right to bear arms”.
“We shot the video with Stormy months ago," says Granny, "but we received some push-back from radio and media about the sensitive subject, so we sat on the release of the song and video - but now we’re just going for it.”
That’s not a “different perspective”, Granny, that’s opportunism.
Man With A Mission’s Take Me Under, meanwhile, is just the simple tale of our favourite half-man half-wolf band’s ongoing war with the, like, pigdudes. It’s also the theme to the new film adaption of manga series Inuyashiki, the story of an old guy and a teenager who are both given special powers and end up going to war and destroying most of Tokyo.