14 things you could buy instead of a $2500 Guns N' Roses VIP ticket

Following the news that Guns N’ Roses are performing two pre-Coachella shows in April, it has been revealed they’re currently offering fans a ‘Signature VIP Experience’ for their Las Vegas dates.

Nothing out of the ordinary there. Many bands do this as par for the course to cover the costs of touring. But Guns N’ Roses are asking fans to part with $2500 for the privilege. For that sort of money, we’d expect a piggy back from Axl during the reggae breakdown of Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door. Or maybe a go on the piano during the teary climax of November Rain. Those foolish enough to stump up the cash for this VIP package won’t even get to meet the band at all. And that really takes the piss.

So what do you get? A ticket in the first 10 rows, a signed limited edition poster, a photo on the stage before the show (on your own), a tour of the backstage area, pre-show cocktails and a few other bits and pieces. The ticket link also includes ‘Memories That Last A Lifetime’ as part of the package. Apparently you can put a price on memories. And it’s about the same as two month’s rent in a London flat.

Oh, silly us. There’s a special laminate and lanyard too. Would you spend that amount of money to walk past some roadies, get drunk and perhaps see Axl Rose run around onstage looking like a Top Gear presenter on his way to an Indiana Jones party?

This got us thinking. What could you buy instead of a Signature VIP Experience, then? It turns out that you can get a metric fuckton of stuff and not sit waiting around for a certain someone to show up hours late.

You could buy…

**Two Smith & Wesson 17 Classic pistols
**
**1200 roses
**
**12 leather top hats
**
**116 distressed GN’R T-shirts
**
**11 white leather biker jackets
**
**388 red bandanas
**
**One Gibson Les Paul Deluxe Metallic Gold Top
**
**2910 Mars Bars
**
**19 nights at Caesars Palace, plus general admission ticket to see Guns N’ Roses
**
**8,730 packets of Space Raiders
**
**A 24-year subscription to Netflix
**
**14-year subscription to Spotify Premium
**
**70 sheep for African villages through Oxfam
**
A 36.5 year subscription to TeamRock+

What do you think of Guns N’ Roses’ VIP package? Let us know in the comments below…

Born in 1976 in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, Simon Young has been a music journalist for over twenty-six years. His fanzine, Hit A Guy With Glasses, enjoyed a one-issue run before he secured a job at Kerrang! in 1999. His writing has also appeared in Classic Rock, Metal Hammer, Prog, and Planet Rock. His first book, So Much For The 30 Year Plan: Therapy? — The Authorised Biography is available via Jawbone Press.