Tweet Surrender

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Icelandic wool exhibits, broken amps and ‘Wet Willies’? What could it all mean? Find out in this week’s Tweet Surrender.

What have we learned from the Paramore vocalist’s day out? That Björk could make an absolute killing if she sold knitting patterns at her merch table. Which is probably made out of unicorn dreams.

The Enter Shikari frontman didn’t take Thursday’s General Election result very well, to the point where he’d prefer two moistened fingers inserted into his ears rather than a Tory government. True story: this writer witnessed a German music journalist do this to a colleague on a mini-bus en route to an Iron Maiden gig in Brazil. The results: lots of angry shouting, including the word ‘scheisse’.

The Black Sabbath guitarist there, paying tribute to the late Rainbow and Elf bassist Craig Gruber who passed away last week.

The Pretty Reckless and Halestorm started their Carnival Of Madness tour of the US this week. Looks like their roadies are having a blast, don’t they?

We’d be more inclined to hit the gym if they played heavy metal. We could totally run the entire duration of Rime Of The Ancient Mariner, if it wasn’t for this injury we’ve just made up.

There’s an idea for anyone who’s stuck for ideas on what to do on their birthday. Get really good at playing the blues, book a massive tour and make sure you book a decent venue for the big day – lots of people at your party. Thanks Joe!

This week, the Social Distortion frontman told TeamRock: “I’m interested in the darker side of life; crime, sins, and passion. They’re the things that stimulate me.” He forgot to add teeny wittle doggy heists to that list.

The Dillinger Escape Plan drummer’s tweet made us imagine a world where dinosaurs had access to these litter grabbers. The ending of Jurassic Park could’ve been very different. Also: a cleaner dinosaur theme park.

We all have an inner Larry David. And sometimes, it’s prettay, prettay good.

We bet Star Trek fans hated this joke.