This is the most metal song about cereal we have ever heard


You might think that unless you eat a cauldron full of spikes and leather for breakfast, then you’re not very metal. That is, of course, bullshit. Cereal is THE BEST. Flakes, balls and clusters of sweet wheaty goodness, covered in chocolate, fruit, cinnamon and everything else you can think of – it’s the meal of kings. If we could just eat cereal forever then we totally would.

And we’re not the only ones.

David – the man behind RiffShop – has written the aptly named The Cereal Song about his undying love for Krave, Reese’s Puffs, Crunch Berries and more. It’s basically a heavy metal ode to milk-covered carbohydrates, and a reminder that America has the most bonkers cereal around. There’s also a br00tal pig squeal for “Wheatiiiiiiiiies!” which we’re going to sing every time we hit the cereal aisle in Tesco.

There’s also an imaginary battle royal between the biggest cereal mascots around – we’d love to see Snap, Crackle and Pop kick the living fuck out of the Trix Rabbit.

But the real question is: Which cereal is the best?

When musicians don't know music theory

This guy gets paid to headbang to Slayer all day