What’s the most illegal thing you’ve ever done?
“I don’t know if this is applicable but hilariously I once got arrested for stealing my own car, even though I didn’t steal it. Someone broke into our house and stole nothing but the keys a week before. Then one night I hear this almighty roar from the driveway and off goes the car. The police decided that it was obviously me. It was the most ridiculous thing and I spent a night in a police cell for a crime I didn’t commit.”
What’s the most metal album you own?
“Lamb Of God – Sacrament. When I used to work for my parents, I used to smash these old fireplaces out. I used to just stick Walk With Me In Hell on and I almost gained strength from the riffs. I really love the tone and the attitude.”
What’s the worst injury you have ever had?
“I was out for one of my ex-girlfriends’ birthdays. I stood up to take my third ‘Nightmare’ in succession – it’s a drink which consists of Galliano, Baileys, Sambuca and Blue Curaçao – when I fell backwards and hit my head and I made such a bang that the manager heard it from upstairs.”
What’s the grossest thing you’ve ever had in your mouth?
“When I was in Brazil on the Maiden tour we went to an eaterie where they just continually bring meat round. I tried a couple of chicken hearts. I ate two of them, just to determine whether or not it was gross. Afterwards I felt literally like I’d lost a part of my soul.”
What’s the most you have ever been sick?
“It was probably the night we spoke about earlier, because after I hit my head I was taken to the hospital. I said I needed to be sick and my ex, bless her, she couldn’t find anything for me to be sick in, so she just kind of cupped her hands. It was just liquid and it just kept coming out.”
What’s the worst fight you’ve ever been in?
“I was in the same place and a good friend of mine came up to the door just as I left. His gums were covered in blood, jumped by a bunch of thugs. I just lost my temper. There were five or six of these guys and I knew I had no chance whatsoever but I threw a few punches and then pretty much got kicked into the kerb.”
When was the last time you bled?
“I’ve got a scar on my hand. I did briefly go into work to help my dad when we were off tour. I was chopping out a tiled fireplace and slipped straight up the tile and there was blood pouring out everywhere. That was probably a month ago.”
What’s the rarest piece of merch you own?
“Technically it’s not merch because I didn’t buy it, but I’ve got a few mementos from Ed Force One – the covers from the headrest, lots of plastic Ed Force One cups…”
What’s your most painful tattoo or piercing?
“Tattoos, I am a total blank canvas. Piercing-wise, I’ve got five piercings in my right ear and I can’t actually say any of them hurt. In my opinion, the lobes hurt more than the cartilage.”
What’s the most metal picture on you’ve got on your phone?
“I’ve got one in front of Ed Force One. What more do you need to say? Bruce Dickinson is flying that fucking plane!”
Final Score: 8⁄10
Being nicked for something you didn’t do must constitute minus points, but Mike redeems himself because, well, Ed Force One.
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