The Hell's Top Ten Wrestlers

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The Hell are headlining a show next month called MetalMania, which is branded suspiciously like an old-school WrestleMania so we thought we’d find out what frontman Nail$’s favourite wrestlers are. Some of these might not be on our list…

10. JOHN CENA GREAT MERCH. HUSTLE. LOYALTY. RESPECT. ON A FUCKING SWEATBAND.

9. HULK HOGAN GEEZER BLEACHES HIS FUCKING MOUSTACHE.

8. THE FIST JUST A BIG FIST, HE’S A SMASHING BLOODY MASSIVE FIST.

7. WYCLEF JEAN UNFORGETTABLE AS PART OF A TAG TEAM WITH THE “DWAYNE JOHNSON” ROCK.

6. PAPA SHANGO TOTAL FUCKING BOLLOCKS.

5. JEFF HARDY LOOKS LIKE HE GOT LOST ON THE SET OF A GODSMACK VIDEO.

4. KANE HE’S A BIG GREEBO WHO COVERS HIS FACE. TOP WRESTLE.

3. TRISH STRATUS HIT VINCE MCMAHON IN THE FACE.

2. SNOOKI BEAT THE SITUATION FOR THE DICKHEADWEIGHT TITLE.

1. THE SHOCKMASTER GREATEST WRESTLER TO HAVE EVER LIVED EVER.

The Hell are headlining Venn’s MetalMania event in London on 2nd July. Find out more here.