Weller's potty-mouthed remarks come in a multi-page interview in the December issue of Record Collector (opens in new tab), which is a Paul Weller special. When the magazine asserts that one of the songs on Noel Gallagher's upcoming album sounds suspiciously like The Cure's 1980 classic A Forest, Weller reacts with what the writer describes as a mix of "incredulity and revulsion."
"Really??!“ asks Weller. "I can’t fucking stand them. Fucking fat cunt, with his lipstick and all that bollocks. He is my age as well, isn’t he?"
"He’s a fucking knob end," the irate modfather continues. "I don’t like him. There you go. There’s someone I would work with. I’d fucking slap him, or something."
Back in 2004, Smith revealed how Weller's former band The Jam had inadvertently assisted The Cure during the recording of their debut album Three Imaginary Boys, so maybe Weller is angry about that.
“The Jam were recording their album during the day," Smith told Rolling Stone, "and we used to sneak in at night and use their equipment – we knew the bloke who was looking after it – to record our album. We just borrowed tape and stuff".
Or perhaps Weller, the man who inspired the widely mocked "wellend" haircut, is still annoyed by an interview The Cure gave as long ago as 1985, in which Smith claimed that punk wasn't a political movement, and that people were simply tired of listening to bands like Yes and Genesis and wanted something they could dance to.
"You'd have to be particularly stupid to believe someone like Paul Weller," said Smith, perhaps alluding to The Jam's avowedly political songs, before adding, with a grin, "You'd have to be particularly stupid to believe someone like me."
Coincidentally, both The Jam and The Cure were discovered by the same A&R man, Chris Parry, who signed The Jam to Polydor in 1977 and The Cure to his own label, Fiction Records, the following year. Perhaps he can be brought in to mediate this unseemly beef.
The Cure are currently on tour in Europe. Full dates below.
The Cure: Lost World Tour - European dates
Nov 11: Madrid Wizink Center, Spain
Nov 13: Toulouse Zenith, France
Nov 14: Bordeaux Arkea Arena, France
Nov 15: Nantes Zenith, France
Nov 17: Francenkfurt Festhalle, Germany
Nov 18: Strasbourg Zenith, France
Nov 19: Basel St Jakobshalle, Switzerland
Non 21: Stuttggart Hans-Martin-Schleyer-Halle, Germany
Nov 22: Cologne Lanxess Arena, Germany
Nov 23: Antwerp Sportpaleis, Belgium
Nov 25: Amsterdam Ziggo Dome, The Netherlands
Nov 27: Lievin Stade, France
Nov 28: Paris Accor Arena, France
Dec 01: Dublin 3Arena, Ireland
Dec 02: Belfast SSE, UK
Dec 04: Glasgow OVO Hydro, UK
Dec 06: Leeds First Arena Direct, UK
Dec 07: Birmingham UtilItaly Arena, UK
Dec 08: Cardiff Motorpoint Arena, UK
Dec 11: London SSE Arena, UK
Tickets are on sale now (opens in new tab).